At My Father's Side

Some of you may know that my father has been placed in the hospital fighting a staff infection on his heart. Just three weeks ago, my incredible father was on the golf course with friends and living a very independent and happy life. Still working four days a week until his illness, my father loved life and was up for any adventure. He's always been like that: strong-willed, independent, and full of life. The last three weeks as he fought his infection and endured a major surgery, we have seen my dad struggle in a way I never have seen before.

(Photo borrowed from my daughter's Instagram feed.)

I'm his oldest child; and he is single, which means my sweet siblings and I are the ones to care for him when he is ill. We consider it a privilege. He is an incredible man, and we love him dearly.

Watching your parent be sick and suffer is incredibly difficult. We've all shed our share of tears. It's just not what you want for the person who raised you and cared for you and sacrificed so much for you. It just doesn't seem fair. And we feel incredibly helpless to make it all better for him.

Having been through this on some level before with my son's illness and passing, I know that this can stretch on for a while. Finding a new normal, making sure dad is taken care of, and making sure all of us stay healthy are all important.

I'm grateful for the job that I have that allows me 1) to be creative. I'm finding that having a few hours of creativity a day are VERY important to balance out the stress of worry. The brain and the soul need a break throughout the day. I'm also grateful 2) that I work remotely from home so that I can work from the hospital. While a lot of my job requires me to be at my home, I can also do many things here while I'm watching over my dad. I so appreciate being able to work as he rests and recovers. And 3) I'm so appreciative of the community of crafters I know and love, as they sustain and support each other during hard times. Despite all we are going through I feel very blessed.

If I seem on and off for the next bit, it's because I'm trying to balance the day-to-day changes. We will be ok. I feel sustained and strengthened by your prayers, love and faith. We will figure this out, and in the meantime I'm grateful for the blessings and tender mercies I see every day.