It's Terrifying to Be a Parent!

We are recovering from a bout of illness at our house. Sunday morning my husband and I had a meeting early in the morning. We came home to discover that James had awakened but returned to his bed. In understanding this story, you have to realize that this is something the boy NEVER does. So I was a little surprised to hear this. He came bounding down the stairs, however, when he heard us enter the house. After breakfast we all retired to our rooms to prepare for church. As the time for leaving drew near, it dawned on me that the house was unusually quiet. No sounds of Legos battling or blocks heading to war. I went to James' room to check on him and he was sound asleep in bed.

Now I was REALLY worried. This is the both who throws a fit if the word "nap" is ever mentioned. I knew that something was wrong and even went so far as to check his breathing. Thankfully he was just sleeping.

So I took Kate and we headed out to church while Brett remained at home to watch over the boy. But all during the meeting my mind was uneasy. It is so unlike him to take a nap volutarily. I knew something was wrong.

I raced home after the first hour of church to find him in my bed with a cloth over his head and drinking something. He had the shakes and his voice was high pitched and weepy. Brett, concerned, told me that James was running a fever around 102 degrees. James has never had a fever that hot before. He usually stays around 99 or 100 degrees. I was concerned, especially about the shakes. We removed his clothing and gave him liquid and cool cloths. We debated about taking him to an after hours clinic, but weren't sure what might be wrong.

After about 45 minutes his temperature dropped a degree, and Brett had to teach a lesson in church so off they went. The ibuprofen seemed to be working and James got more chatty and requested some muffins, which I was more than happy to make. He wasn't up for watching tv as his head felt like it was going to explode so I read the book Fablehaven to him instead.

We were a 100 pages in when Brett and Kate returned from church. James's fever had spiked again so I gave him another dose of medicine. He drifted off to sleep but had only been asleep for about five minutes when his eyes popped open and he grabbed his chest, "My heart," he said which completely freaked me out and then he proceeded to throw up everything he had previously digested. Now I was really freaking out! My husband gave him a Priesthood blessing, which is a blessing of healing given in our church from those who have the authority to do so.

James relaxed and fell asleep and seemed to gradually improve and then his fever would spike again. We did this on and off throughout the night. We realized that he probably had some kind of virus and that taking him in would do little to help. (And that his heart raced when he needed to throw up and made him scared.) Although we knew that if he hit 103 degrees, we were going in no matter what just for comfort's sake.

This is all seems routine except that Jimmy looks a great deal like his big brother Joey. Watching my youngest in bed, running a fever, and suffering raised memories of my oldest son's suffering through a multitude of illnesses including his fight with cancer. It was terribly frightening, and I feel like I've been on high alert for the past 48 hours. I don't think I will ever be able to relax again when my children or husband are sick. The body is so fragile, and I'm not naive to the bad things that can happen in life. Thankfully James is doing much better and his fever has gone down quite a bit. He was even able to eat a little bit yesterday. I'm hoping that when he wakes this morning that he will be completely healed.

So parenting has its shares of scares. I'm thankful this is a minor one. I'm so tired of the big ones!


  1. Anonymous7:05 AM

    (((hugs))) I'm sorry your little guy is not feeling well and that it caused hard memories for you. Being a parent is just scary sometimes. Becca

  2. it is so difficult when the kiddos get sick. i hope he is feeling much better. :)

  3. It is so so scary when our little ones are sick. I can only imagine how much more scary for you with all that you have been through!! I really hope that James is feeling so much better today!! Hugs!

  4. sending you love and calming thoughts from the other side of the world.. Parenthood gives us the most enormous joys and the hardest of heartbreaks. your in my prayers..xx

  5. So sorry Jen that you went through this. I can only imagine what it must be like for you to have the memories of Joey's illnesses just under the surface, and then to have them come right back when someone in your family is sick. (((HUGS))). Glad to hear that Jimmy is on the mend, and that things are slowly getting back to normal, though. That's a blessing.


  6. sooooooooooo SCARY!!!! it's soooooo hard being a parent...when you have absolutely no control!!!
    sending hugs and prayers!

  7. oh sweetie ((((HUGS)))) i've always wondered how their similar looks affected you in your day to day life. i know it isn't easy. love and prayers to you sweet friend.


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